As I stood rocking my son to sleep, gently swaying to the sound of “Rock A Bye Baby” playing softly from his mobile, I began to think about time and how quickly it passes. When my daughter was a baby, just over two years ago, I would rock her to sleep just the same, the difference being, with her, I was able to be completely in the moment, blissfully unaware of just how quickly time flies. She was my first baby after all, and no matter how hard I tried, I was unable to imagine her any older than she was at that very minute. It’s different with the second baby. I feel like my son is growing up right before my eyes, every time I blink he is reaching a new milestone! My daughter is living proof that they do not stay babies forever, and once they grow out of a certain phase there is no going back.
This has been a very emotional realization for me to come to. When my daughter was a baby I always knew that I would have another child one day. Now, after having our son, my husband and I are very happy with our little family of four, one girl and one boy; it feels complete. When my daughter moved from stage to stage I used to find comfort in the thought of having another baby and watching him or her go through each stage all over again. Now, as I watch my son grow up it feels like the door for each phase has closed completely behind him, never to be opened again, resulting in a very emotional mommy!
The last couple weeks have been a whirl wind of lowering his crib to the lowest setting, packing up the baby swing, that has been used by both of my babies now and had sat unused for weeks but I just couldn’t come to terms with the fact that he had out grown it, and realizing that my days of nursing are numbered (one word – teeth!). He is also pulling himself up on furniture, climbing up steps, and even said “Dada” for the first time!! The reality is hitting me hard that my baby is growing up, at what feels like warp speed, and I am left trying to hang on to each and every “baby” moment as though it were his last. As excited as I am to see my children growing up healthy and truly thriving in life I guess I am just a little nostalgic as I watch my sweet baby transforming into a little boy.
– Kristen, Not aLone Mom